Family vs. Sports

I've seen a few posts lately on FB regarding the family dinner vs. sports and other activities, especially as the kids get older.  I thought I'd offer my own thoughts on the subject.  Now, I'll warn you, this is definitely not the popular opinion, and I probably will get flak for it, but hey, it's my blog and my opinion.  :)

Some parents have each of their children in multiple sports/activities throughout the week.  And then they complain that they don't have time for a family dinner anymore.  But it's "not fair to the kids" to take them out of said sports/activities, even if these activities are costing them an arm and a leg to be in dollar-wise, and a priceless amount family time-wise.

So here is my suggestion.  Cut back to 1 activity at a time per child.  See if that fixes your problem.  It may not...  But it may, depending on the activity(ies) they end up with and how many kids you have.  It's tough to choose a favorite sport/activity, but how else can one get really, really good at something if they don't concentrate on it?  If this does not solve the problem, then take them out altogether, or choose a different activity on a different day or in a different time slot.

Honestly, unless the child is planning on playing or doing that activity professionally as an adult after college (if they choose to attend), do they really need to be in it?  Of course not.  I, for one, know for a fact that neither of my 2 oldest girls will be professional gymnasts after college, nor will they be going to the Olympics.  But they love it!  If their practices or meets as they get older get in the way of family time, I'll have them choose an activity that does not hinder our time.  I am a jealous mom about family time, and I guard it viciously.  I absolutely hate it when my husband isn't home from work in time to eat with us, and it bugs me when he eats somewhere else (TV or computer).

I believe God will provide in His timing exactly what my children will need to become the adults He wants them to become.  So if Angel needs art lessons, and the one she really wants just won't work out for our schedule, then another one that in the long run will be much more important will come along.  If Bug Girl needs robot lessons, she'll get them - when it works out for us as a family.  Same with dance class for Peanut.  And whatever will come up for Trouble.

And when you really think about it, "it's not fair to the kids" is really a bad excuse.  What about all those kids around the world, 50 years ago, even today's inner-city kids?  Really?  "It's not fair?" 

Also, over-scheduling kids is agreed by the experts to NOT help kids.  It stresses them out, can knock their grades down (lack of sleep and proper nutrition), and actually can hurt their self-esteem rather than building them up like parents like to think they're doing.  Go figure - less is more.

Family time is so much more important than a short-term "fun" activity.  I urge all parents to let go of the "status quo," "but everyone's doing it," "but what will their/my friends say" mentality and focus on what is truly, really important in the long run - the relationships within your own home.