I woke up this morning from a dream that kept me in the pit of despair for quite some time this morning. It reminded me of a really big mistake from my past, and I wallowed in it for much longer than I should have. It's not something I can easily correct, nor even really want to, because attempting to fix it would mean making an even bigger mistake - one that I'm not willing to live with. I know others have been where I am - friends have assured me of that on Facebook, forums, and through private messages. What they also reminded me of, is that God is bigger than that big mistake. Much bigger. And He can take my big mistake and make it into something beautiful, if I'll only let Him. I'm trying, I really am. It's been several years since I made this mistake, and while it has gotten easier over time, I have days like today where I just wish things were different. I wish I could have said and done things differently, but would they have made things better? Probably not. Most likely my problems would have been 10 times worse (no exaggerating, I promise).
My friend Dana showed me a music video by Toby Mac, "Get Back Up," and it was most timely. It did bring me back up and gave me hope that I can get through this once again. Again, I thank her for sharing that video. I hope it gives you hope, as well.
"I waited patiently for the LORD;
He turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
He set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.
He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear
and put their trust in the LORD." ~Psalm 40:1-3
Lord, You know which mistake I speak of. And yet You keep no record of wrongs. Help me to look to You through this time of trial and temptation, and keep me strong. For You are stronger and bigger than all my mistakes. You are my God, and I will exalt You. In Jesus' name, Amen.
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