I'm a Special Needs Mom

I never realized I was a special needs mom until a year after our first adoption.

It had never occurred to me that our new kidlets were special needs. When I realized one day that they were struggling academically, and moreover, that they had trauma, it hit me like a ton of bricks.

An Aha Moment: they were special needs kids.

Another ton of bricks hit me when I opened my eyes to see that our bio son, now diagnosed as gifted with ADHD (referred to as 2e), is also a special needs kiddo, just on another end of a spectrum.

Whammy number three came when we finally discovered our bio daughter has autism – and were proved correct through formal testing and diagnosis.

Then we adopted 3 supposedly healthy, normal kids. Wrong! Huge special needs issues going on there, both behaviorally and academically.

In the past year we realized our oldest bio daughter is also 2e: gifted and dyslexic.

Another bio son is likely gifted, as well (he’s just like his older brother).

That leaves one bio daughter without any diagnoses at this time, though I do suspect something at play. We’ll likely get a neuropsych eval for her sometime next year.

For those keeping score, that is 9 out of 10 kids with various special needs, all added and/or diagnosed within 4 years.

To say we were thrown for a loop is a major understatement.

We’ve learned so much along this journey, and yet we are far from knowing it all, far from figuring out how to help them all. We’ve learned strategies, we’ve learned burn out, we’ve learned survival and thriving. We’ve attempted some strategies only to find they either weren’t working, required too much time commitment or money, or just didn’t feel right to us. What worked for 1 or 2 kids didn’t necessarily work for the rest, or vice versa. We’ve had ups and downs, bumps and bruises, sunshine and clouds, rain and rainbows, mountains and valleys.

But through it all, we are a family. And God’s love binds us, holds us, forgives us, strengthens us, molds us, leads us. As a family.

And that’s what being a special needs family is all about – leaning on God through each and every day, one day at a time, good or bad. 

God’s got this. 

God’s got you.

Things I've Learned as a Homeschooler

I've been homeschooling a long time now.  My oldest is in 9th grade this year, and we started her Kindergarten year.  So this is Year 10 for me, with many years left as my current youngest is just about 3.

As I've reflected over the past many years, I realized that I have learned many things as we've gone along.  I thought I'd share some of them with you.

1. I'm not into reading aloud.
   
   I'm just not.  Nothing wrong with doing it, and I often wish I were more of a read-aloud type person, but I'm not.  I do it sometimes during our Morning Basket, and I really love doing bedtime stories (picture books) with the kids, but overall, I just don't like reading out loud.
   
   Before you worry, all 7 of my children are bookworms, so it has no effect on what or how often or how much they're reading.
   
   But not all families can be read-aloud families.  And I'm not one of them.  I still feel bad about that sometimes, but it's why I don't join Sarah Mackenzie's Read-Aloud Revival, for example.  It's just one more thing on my plate - for me to feel bad that I can't implement properly.  So I just know this about myself, and I choose not to join in the fun, because it wouldn't be fun for me.
2. I'm not a scheduler.
   
   I tried.  I tried so hard.  For years.  And I failed every time.  Or I felt so stuffed in, or we felt stressed and anxious all the time, and I had timers going off all the time (OK, so I still have the alarms going on my phone all day long because Mom Brain).  All my life I've been a fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants sort of person.  Type B.  And I thought all homeschoolers had to be Type A, especially as I had more and more kids schooling.  It got to the point, though, that I was never, ever going to get everything done.  Ever.  And I almost had a nervous breakdown over it.
   
   So we scrapped everything and unschooled for months.  Well over a year, actually.  Wow.  That felt good.
   
   I'm starting to get my bearings again, and I'm learning that if I'm going to attempt a schedule again, it has to be on a loop, it has to have ultimate flexibility, and I can't feel locked into it.  It has to be as open-and-go as possible, even if I have to take the time to make it that way.  My "schedule" nowadays consists of a start time for Morning Basket (or around thereabouts), lunch at noon, getting kids to and from activities or jobs, and clean-up & chores at 5pm.  That's it.  I am so happy with a routine.  I get up somewhere between 6 & 7am, but it's not consistent, and sometimes it'll be later than 7am if the toddler lets me sleep.  :)
3. I hate math.
   
   No, actually, I always loved it all through my school years.  I took geometry (bane of my existence!!!!), trigonometry, and calculus in high school.  I took calculus again in college - twice - the 2nd time because I needed some credits and my fiance (now hubby) had to take it.  LOL  Yeah, I'm kind of a glutten for punishment like that.  But I liked math!  A lot!
   
   And then I had kids I had to teach.  And I didn't know how.  Apparently, I'm just good at memorizing formulas.  I have tried so. many. math programs.  I'd like to kick math to the curb and never see it again.  They can learn their own stinkin' math.  Grrrr....  (I do get independent-of-me programs now for them.  It just drives me nuts.  I can help them with individual things they aren't getting, but I don't want to teach it ALL to ALL of them.)
4. There is nothing worse than feeling like you're failing your kids.
   
   Like in math.  Or writing.  Or reading.  Or social studies, history, science, art, music, or whatever other stinking subject there is out there.  Literally, all eyes are on you.  And if your kids fail, or aren't as good as other children their age, or aren't meeting some arbitrary stranger's measuring stick - you have failed in the eyes of the world.  Sometimes even in the eyes of your own husband.
   
   That's a heavy weight to bear.
   
   The truth is, most of us homeschooling moms already know our limitations and failings.  We don't need to hear, "I told you so," "Why did you even try to homeschool at all," or "Why don't you just send them to school?"  We need encouragement, we need someone to come alongside us and help us, we need support.  We already know, OK?  So please don't kick us while we're down.
5. No two families are the same.
   
   They don't look the same, they don't act the same, they don't talk the same, they don't eat the same - so why would they all educate the same way?  Of course they can't!  Each family is unique.  Each child within each family is unique.  You cannot do the same things with every single child and every single family and have them all turn out exactly the same.  This is a huge reason I strongly dislike the traditional school building model (though yes, it can work for some).
   
   And to be true to that idea, I needed to learn that we can't all be Charlotte Mason homeschoolers.  Just like I can't teach in a classical way, or a Montessori way, or what-have-you, I also found out that not everyone can teach 100% the Charlotte Mason way.
   
   Like me, for example.  I find her philosophy beautiful.  Strong.  And I agree with so very much of it.  I would have loved to have gone through one of her schools!
   
   But.
   
   Her methods work better for a school setting (like my Sunday school class), not my homeschool.  Especially when 7 children are vying for your attention.  I just couldn't do it.
   
   Again, almost had a nervous breakdown trying to do it for 4.  Add in 3 more, and I thought I was going to die.  Finding other ways of doing things, and ultimately, what can I do with all the kids together is what is helping us move on and find what is unique about our family.  This is what our Morning Basket is all about.  And our Adventures we go on every Friday and sometimes in the afternoons.  Being together as a family is what makes our homeschool - and our family - unique.
6. Even though schedules don't work for me, I must have bedtimes and evening routines in place.
   
   This staying up till 10, 11, 12:00 every night?  It kills me.  I need some down time.  I'm an introvert.  I need quiet and peace.  I need to get to bed on time myself!  I need time with my husband, without kids interrupting all the time.  So bedtimes it is.  Nothing wrong with others not having bedtimes, or having much later (or earlier) bedtimes than we have - but I gotta have 'em.
7. Clutter makes me anxious.
   
   I did not know this about myself until very recently.  While I've decluttered a lot in the past, it never registered in my brain what anxiety is.  Once I learned the definition of it and what it looks like - all because I now have 3 kids with varying degrees of anxiety - I figured out that it is what is causing me to have horrid mood swings and to lose my sanity.
   
   So we are going minimalist, as much as we can.  Haha....  This goes for emails, too.  And Facebook.  No more emails!  Aaaaahhhhh!  Ok, some is fine, especially from friends and family and adoption matters.  I have all coupon/sale type emails going straight to a coupon folder.  If I am going to a store, I try to remember to look there before I head out.  Blogs I mostly follow on Facebook rather than on emails, but I usually only have a couple I keep on my newsfeed.
   
   Don't ask me about minimizing the books.  :P
8. My kids are all different.
   
   They are all unique.  Angel, for example, is a seamstress and artist and bookworm.  Give her a worksheet, and she'll cry through the whole thing, but she'll do it.  Give Piglet a worksheet, and her hand will hurt because writing causes physical pain for her.  She just won't do it.  But she can draw better than some of the best artists!  Peanut?  She is a late bloomer on reading & writing.  Worksheets had to be dictated to me for a very long time.  And she is an actress.  Trouble is gifted.  His brain works in an entirely different way than mine.  I have no clue how he comes up with the things he does.  Tumbler has learning deficits and memory issues due to life in an orphanage.  Learning is very hard for her - but she has been thriving in confirmation class and Sunday school in more of a traditional setting.  Hmmmm....  Lego Dude also has some learning delays, but he is astounding at math.  He has come so, so far in math.  And he and Trouble are the only kids who math comes easily for.  The rest of them have to work HARD at it, with many tears.
   
   Point being?  They are all different!  Use what works for each of them.  Don't standardize your
   family.  Guilty as charged... 
   
   
9. I can't do everything.
   
   I can't teach everything to everyone all of the time and be everything to everyone all of the time.  I can't do Poetry Tea Time plus read-alouds plus individual math programs one-on-one plus narrations for every single book from every single child plus foreign language plus run a co-op plus teach Sunday school plus direct the Christmas program plus keep up with the house plus make healthy meals plus read my own books plus be a wife plus, plus, plus, plus.
   
   I just can't.
   
   And no one can.  We all choose what is most important to us, and we go with it.  And that's how it should be.  Time must be divided into priorities, just like your budget.  You will spend time on the things that are most important to you.  And if you look at what you're spending time on, and it doesn't add up to what you know you want to be priorities - well, then, you change what you're spending time on.  You get your priorities straight.  And you try again.
10. God's grace is sufficient for you.
    
    Yes, it is.  He will see you through.  He will be sure your kids are ready for the "real world" upon graduation.  And He loves them even more than you do.  He died for them.  He died for you.  And because of that, He's got your back.  Go to work, Mama.  And relax.  You've got this.  It's OK to learn, it's OK to grieve and regret - but don't dwell on it.  Learn from it, and move on, and just rely on Him to help you raise your kids to be the best they can be - who they were meant to be - designed by God Himself.  That's the most important in all of this, anyway.

Five Solas

Today for Poetry Tea Time, we studied hymns and their rhyming.  You know, AABB, ABABCC, AABCBCDD, and all that?  It was fun!  They really started to catch on (especially the oldest two).

After we studied 4 hymns and their rhyming patterns, we each took a stab at writing our own hymn (ie, rhyming pattern poem).  Here's mine!  Can you spot the pattern?

FIVE SOLAS

By grace alone

Christ did atone;

Our deeds can earn us nothing.

Through faith alone

Heav’n we now own;

Children of the heav’nly King.

In Christ alone

We find our hope;

We’re sure of our salvation.

Scripture alone,

Failsafe doctrine;

It is our sure foundation.

To God alone

All glory giv’n;

Alleluia and Amen!

Plunged

He's gifted.  All this time - we knew, but we had no proof, so we ignored it and looked into other things.  And now we do.  Have proof.  And as I've sorted through vast amounts of information the past couple of weeks, I have become confused and trying to sort through what I believe and why.  And as I pondered it tonight, I was inspired to write this poem:



Plunged

Gifted-

Awkward
Crazy
Emotional
Pulled this way and that

What do I believe about education?
What things will stay the same?
And what things will need to change?

How can I better help him learn
Grow
Explore the world
Reach for the stars
Give him what he needs-
So that he can reach his full potential?

What can I do to be a better mom?
How can I help him
Find himself
Learn about why he is the way he is
Encourage him
Have his back?

Lord, help us help him.
Give us patience
Love
Kindness
Understanding
Respect.
Help us to grow
Help us to learn
Help us to want what's best for him-
Even if it's different than what we expected.

Help us come to an understanding
A truce
A compromise
For how to best teach and train him
To become what You want him to be
To grow into the person You created him to be
To love life and all it has to offer.
Help us to tread carefully
When it comes to his faith.
Help us to nurture it
Encourage it
Help it to bear fruit-
And not mangle it with his
Overpassion and overlogic.

Help us
Sort through the vast amounts of information
Discover what is truly important
To him
To us
To our family
To our life
To his life.

Ah, giftedness.
A blessing, truly-
And difficult
Abnormal
And yet perfect
Just the way God made him.

Let us ever be grateful for this life you've given us.

Read to Me Tuesday

I wanted to have a day focused on read-alouds, so I chose Tuesdays as Read to Me Tuesday.  But not just read-alouds, but also learning to read.

It's pretty simple, actually.  As a reminder, here's our Tuesday list:

This is a loop, just like Monday's.  Wherever we leave off is where we start next time.  I love doing loops.  It makes me feel like we're fitting a lot more in than we technically are.  Haha!

Fairy Tale is just grabbing a fairy tale book off the shelf and reading one.  I have several fairy tale books, with stories from all over the world.  I have an Alaskan one, an Indian one, Andersen & Grimm, Andrew Lang's entire set, a Ukrainian one, Folk Tales of Germany, etc, etc, etc.  I like fairy tales.  :)

Student Choice is just what it sounds like.  I have a list of all the kids' names, and the next one on the list chooses a book.  We read that book at each Student Choice slot until it's done, then the next kiddo gets to choose.  This could be anything they want to read: picture books, novels, cartoons, the newspaper, fiction, non-fiction, whatever.

I alternate a science book and then a history book.  Right now we're reading Viking Tales by Jennie Hall.  Next we'll be reading The Burgess Bird Book for Children by Thornton W. Burgess.  We usually do narrate these, and sometimes the kids want to do a project with it (or sometimes I see something that might be a fun project and present it to the kids as an idea if they want to pursue it).

Wisdom is usually a Miller book (a series by Mildred A. Martin) or The Children's Book of... series by William J. Bennett.  I have enough of those to last most of our school days and just rotate them in.  I'm sure I'll mix others in there as I happen across one at book sales.  :D

1-on-1 Reading Instruction is more complicated, and yet it's simple.  We split up into pairs, as noted on the schedule.  Peanut teaches D.  He's learning his letters yet, so I have a curriculum I put together for him (since I don't teach preschool or Kindergarten, or even really purposely teach kids to read, I didn't have anything on hand, and I didn't like the stuff I was seeing already put together).  She works out of that.  I show her what to do - the instructions are pretty clear - and then off they go.  Piglet teaches E.  She knows most of the letters and is reading around a 2nd grade level or so, so Piglet helps her learn to match the upper- and lowercase letters, what sounds they all make, or the names she doesn't know, and then E practices her reading with Piglet.  I assigned the Trouble to me.  He needs a special way of working with him, and it's better that I do that than his siblings.  He is at the point that we just practice reading out of the McGuffey readers at his own pace, and I teach any phonics that come up as we go along.  I didn't even get to do word cards with him very much like I did with Peanut because he rushed through that part too quickly.  :P

Read-Aloud is my turn to pick a story.  Right now we're reading Little House in the Big Woods by Laura Ingalls Wilder.

And Student Read-Aloud is their turn to practice reading to the rest of us, not just one-on-one.

That's really all there is to it!  We usually don't do more than about 3 at time, because it's a lot of sitting for little boys.  ;)  They do enjoy the stories, though, and I'm glad I can get some read-aloud time in with them once a week.

Things I've Learned as a Homeschooler

I've been homeschooling since my oldest was in Kindergarten.  She is now an 8th grader, about to turn 14.  Yikes!  Where does the time go???

Over the course of the 9 years I've been teaching my children, I've learned a lot.  I'm still learning more, but we'll go with what we've got so far.

1.  I'm not big on reading aloud.

Wait.  What???  Isn't that what homeschooling is all about???  Aren't I a huge advocate of reading??? Collector of books extraordinaire???

I'm just not a big fan of reading aloud to my kids.  I'm just not.  Absolutely nothing wrong with reading aloud tons to your kids!  I'm a huge advocate of that!  I often wish I did love reading aloud more.  But I just don't.

Now, before you get all worried on me - my kids are huge bookworms.  From the 14yo who doesn't get her work done because she's got her nose stuck in a book, to the kids fresh home from an Eastern European orphanage, to the toddler - they all LOVE books.  Sometimes they think we have too many...    But they all love that they can go grab a book off the shelf.  Either a beloved old favorite or something new they've never experienced before.

So it has no effect at all on what or how often or how much at a time they're reading.  I'm not worried.

But not all families can be read-aloud families.  And that's my family.  My husband, too, has tried to read to the kids, and it's fun - but it just doesn't stick, because we're not that kind of a family.

While I do sometimes still feel bad about not liking to read to my kids, I also know my limitations.  I have learned that it's OK not to join Sarah Mackenzie's Read-Aloud Revival, for example.  It's just another thing on my plate, and I'll feel bad and put myself down and stress myself out trying to do it "right."

Now this doesn't mean I never read to them.  I read to the toddler several mornings a week.  I read to other kids randomly.  I also read several books for school.  So it's not like we never read out loud.  It's just that I don't like it, and we don't do it as often as many other families seem to.

If you are a read-aloud family, that is awesome, and I commend you!  And if you're not, breathe a sigh of relief, Mama, and know that you are not alone in this homeschooling world.

2.  I'm not a scheduler.

I tried.  I tried so hard.  For years.  And I failed every time.  Or I felt stuffed in, or stressed and anxious all day.  I had timers going off all the time (well, I still do, but that's so I get to gymnastics, church, and Confirmation classes on time 😄).  All my life I'd been a fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants sort of person.  Type B.  And I thought all homeschoolers had to be Type A, especially as I had more and more kids schooling.

It got to the point, though, that I was never, ever going to get everything done.  Ever.  And I almost had a nervous breakdown over it.  We scrapped everything and unschooled for months - almost a whole year.

Wow.  That felt good.

I'm starting to get my bearings again, and I'm learning that if I'm going to attempt a schedule again, it has to be a loop, it has to have ultimate flexibility, and I can't feel locked into it.

What I have begun this year with writing our daily schedule on the white board, doing theme days with loops, and leaving it much more loosely planned has helped our family so much.  We are enjoying school again - more than I think we ever have before.  We are having fun, and that's what I had always envisioned for our family.  A routine with a few set times in the day - and that's all I ever really needed.

3.  I hate math.

Not really.  I'd always loved it throughout my school years.  I took geometry (bane of my existence!), trigonometry, and calculus in high school.  I took calculus again in college just because I needed some credits, and my (then future) hubby had to take it.  I'm kind of a glutton for punishment like that.  😊

But the point is, I loved math!  A lot!

And then I had kids to teach.  And I couldn't.  I didn't know how.  Apparently, I'm just really good at memorizing formulas.  I had no idea what to do or why or when.

So I've tried so many math programs.  I'd like to kick math to the curb and never see it again.  They can learn their own stinkin' math.  😡

At the moment we're doing our Math Mania Mondays, Horizons for the younger 4, and Teaching Textbooks for the oldest 2.  We'll see how that goes for awhile yet.   

4.  There is nothing worse than feeling like you're failing your kids.

Like in math.  Or writing.  Or reading.  Or social studies, history, science, art, music, etc, etc.  And we homeschooling moms feel like we're failing A LOT.  At pretty much everything.  We already have that heavy burden on our plates.  It is not helpful when the eyes of the world are on you, and if you don't do it "right" or to someone else's standard, they accuse you of failing your kids - outright or not.  Way to kick us while we're down, right?  That self-doubt comes back.  "Maybe they're right.  Maybe a dedicated teacher at a traditional school would do a better job than me.  Maybe I am failing my kids.  Maybe I don't know what I'm doing.  Maybe I'm going to ruin my kids forever."

I know we all know our limitations and failings.  We don't need to hear, "I told you so," "Why did you even try to homeschool at all?" or "Why don't you just send them to school?"  We need encouragement.  We need someone to come alongside us and help us.  We need support.  So here I am to try to be that for you. YOU CAN DO THIS, MAMA!

Kick those thoughts to the curb!  It's a mighty weight to bear.  Rest assured - Christ has taken that burden off our shoulders!  If He has called you to homeschool, you CAN do this, and you ARE doing the best you can, and you ARE doing it the way your family needs you to do it.  If you're worried, you care way more about your kids than any teacher possibly could.  And that makes you a great Mama and a great teacher!


5.  No two families are the same.

They don't look the same, they don't act the same, they don't talk the same, they don't eat the same - so why would they all educate the same way?

Of course they can't!  Each family is unique.  Each child within each family is unique.  You cannot do the same things with every single child and every single family and have them all turn out exactly the same.

This is a huge reason I strongly dislike the traditional school building model.  And to be true to that idea, I needed to learn that we can't all be Charlotte Mason homeschoolers.  Just like I can't teach in a classical way, or a Montessori way, or what-have-you, I also found that not everyone can teach 100% the Charlotte Mason way.

Like me, for example.  I find her philosophy beautiful.  Strong.  And I agree with so very much of it.

But.

Her methods work better for a school setting (like my Sunday school class) than my homeschool.  Especially with 7 children vying for my attention, I just couldn't do it.  Again, I almost had a nervous breakdown trying to do it for 4.  Add in 3 more, and I thought I was going to die.  (And this isn't to say that no homeschool could possibly do it.  I know many families - even large ones - who are doing it successfully.  It just wasn't working for our family.)

Finding other ways of doing things, and ultimately, what I can do with all the kids together is what is helping us move on and find what is unique about our family.

6.  Even though schedules don't work for me, I must have bedtimes and evening routines in place.

Staying up until 11pm or even midnight kills me.  I can't get enough rest before the next day when I do that.  I need some down time from the kids.  I'm an introvert.  I need quiet - peace - and to get to bed on time myself!  Time to spend with just my husband without the kids listening in or interrupting every 2 minutes.

So bedtimes it is for our family.

7.  Clutter makes me anxious.

I did not know this about myself until very, very recently.  While I've decluttered a lot in the past, it never registered in my brain what anxiety is until I had kids who have differing degrees of anxiety.  I put 2 and 2 together and figured out my own anxiety triggers.  Mood swings ensue and I begin to lose my sanity when I am anxious.

So we are going minimalist.  More on that in another post.

8.  This goes for emails, too.  And Facebook.

Ah, Facebook...  Another bane of my existence.  And spam emails.  "Buy this!  Buy that!  Don't miss out on this latest deal that will put you in debt but will make you happy for about 5 minutes!"

I deleted myself off of tons of groups on Facebook, I hid most people from my timeline (sorry, guys - but I do check up on most of you regularly!), I took myself off of many email lists, I created a Coupon folder in my email so that all sales emails go directly there (I don't even see them - if I'm heading out, I look through my Coupon folder to see if there's anything I can use).

9.  My kids are all different.

How did I not know this from the start?  Duh!  They are all unique.

Angel, for example, is a seamstress and artist and bookworm.  Give her a worksheet, and she'll cry through the whole thing - but she'll get it done.

Give Piglet a worksheet, and her hand will hurt because writing causes physical pain for her.  She won't finish it without a huge fight.

Peanut?  She's a late bloomer and reading and writing but finally making great strides.  Worksheets have to be dictated to me so I can write for her.

I have 2 who love worksheets.  I have 1 who could care less if he does a worksheet or listens to a story or builds towers all day.  😍

Math.  Ugh.  Angel can't do math to save her life, unless it's in real life application.  Then she learns it quickly and thoroughly.  Piglet can do it, but she doesn't really like to.  And she has a math brain!  Peanut?    But Trouble?  He is a WHIZ at math!  Any curriculum, he'll get it.  He is usually 10 steps ahead of me, no matter what I try to teach him.  1 kid is a 1 step forward, 2 steps back type of learner.  Oy!

Point being?  They're all different!  Use what works for each of them.  Don't standardize your family.  Guilty as charged.... 

I'll warrant you're wondering how in the world I keep all this in mind while doing most everything together?  Well, when it's time for Free Writes, 2 or 3 kids prefer to type.  One just mostly draws and adds some letters.  One copies words from a book or just writes random letters.  One prefers to go off on her own to a quiet place and write.  Some like to write with a suggestion.  Others just want to do their own thing.  Trouble prefers to turn everything into Star Wars.  Piglet is an animal lover and turns everything into a story.  She writes whole books and appreciates the time to just write.

Everyone takes what they can from everything we do.  Today we did a project learning about latitude and longitude and figuring out the circumference of the earth.  There is no way the 2 youngest got much out of that, but they got a taste of it.  They got to see how to multiply on the board, even if they didn't get what was happening.  Exposure is a great hook for later learning.  The oldest 2 were slightly confused, but as we talked it out and used the globe to show what the book & I were talking about, they started to get it.  And hey, they got to play with play dough and dental floss!  😎

10.  I can't do everything.

I can't teach everything to everyone all of the time and be everything to everyone all of the time.

I can't do Poetry Tea Time plus read-alouds plus individual math programs one-on-one plus narrations for every single book from every single child plus foreign language plus run a co-op plus teach Sunday school plus direct the Christmas program plus keep up with the house plus make healthy meals plus read my own books, plus, plus, plus, plus.

I just can't.

No one can.

We all choose what is most important to us, and we go with it.  That's how it should be.  Time must be divided into priorities, just like your budget.  You will spend time on the things that are most important to you.

And if you look at what you're spending time on, and it doesn't add up to what you know you want to be priorities - well, then, you change what you're spending time on.  You get your priorities straight.

And then you only do what you can and leave the rest to God.

Which brings me to...

11.  God's grace is sufficient for you.

Yes, it is.  He will see you through.  He will be sure your kids are ready for the "real world" upon graduation.  And He loves them even more than you do.  He died for them.  He died for you.  And because of that, He's got your back.  Go to work, Mama, relaxed and refreshed.  You've got this.

It's OK to learn, it's OK to grieve and regret - but don't dwell on it.  Learn from it, and move on, and just rely on Him to help you raise your kids to be the best they can be - who they were meant to be - designed by God Himself.

That's the most important in all of this, anyway.

Math Mania Monday

Mondays in our house are for Math Mania!  What in the world does that mean?  Well, in a nutshell, it's using living math books, ideas, and projects to teach math to all the kids at once, no matter what level they're at.  I'll walk you through our loop, which we'll work on for 1, maybe 2 hours max, each week.

First up, a math game.  Well, that's easy.  Just pick a game out of our collection that deals in some way with math.  Monopoly and Rummikub are my 12yo's favorites.  We also have the basic number cards and others from RightStart Math and use those for games.  Candyland is great for the youngest, as are Chutes and Ladders and Trouble.  We also love Sorry, Yahtzee, and The Ladybug Game.  Along with several math fact bingo type games and card decks, we have a good selection to choose from each time we hit it on the loop.

Problem of the Week is an email I signed up for to get problems each week on different levels.  Level A is the easiest and is supposed to be about a 3rd/4th grade level.  I'm using it for my 1st, 2nd, and 3rd graders.  Level B is for 5th/6th grades.  I use it for 3rd-6th grades.  Level C is for 7th/8th, Level D is for 9th/10th, and Level E is for 11th/12th.  I use Levels A-D regularly.  I choose the best ones for which students each week. So this week I am doing Level A for my 2 7yos, Level B for the younger 2 girls (ages 10 & 12), and Level D for the oldest 2 (ages 12 & almost 14).

Math Challenges are ideas I get from Pinterest mostly.  :)  These are for the younger 4 students (toddler can join in if he wants, but usually he just destroys things - so we try to make this time during a nap or controlled time when he's not loose wreaking havoc).  Perhaps we'll run a store one day.  FunSchooling had an idea where they run a restaurant.  Click on the Pinterest link to see my Math Board.

While the younger 4 are taking a stab at my Math Challenge, I work on Business Math with the oldest 2.  L is attempting to run a book store, and R is running a pet store.  We aren't very far into it yet, but they've been getting a ton of practice with multiplication with decimals and multiple digits and a little with percentages, as well.

Living Math Books are fun books we're reading through.  3 and the Shape of Three has been a blast learning about triangles and all the things you can do with them.  This is a book I picked up at a used book sale and have not found anywhere else all over the internet. 

We also read books like Sir Cumference, G is for Googol, and Janice Van Cleave's Math for Every Kid.  Lots of fun ones out there, and I pick up more at book sales often.

Living Math Activity is similar to the Math Challenges, but this time I include the biggest girls in on the action.

Life of Fred was recommended to me (a million times) by a good friend.  I finally borrowed hers and tried it out - and the kids were hooked!  So we bought our own set and gave her hers back.  Hee, hee!  The oldest 2 are working through Cats on their own (and I help as needed, which shouldn't be often), and I'm working through Apples with the next 3.  My youngest isn't ready for it yet, though he's probably getting close.  I'll include him in it next year, maybe.  So for now, I have dot to dots and other math type puzzles and activities for him.

And finally, puzzle books.  These are really just activity books I've found and collect to give them some fun time.  Mazes, dot to dots, code books, etc.  Anything that might strike their interest.

Again, we only work for an hour, maybe 2 hours max, and I just mark off where we left off for the next time.  Sometimes we only get 1 thing done in a day, other times several.  Doesn't matter to me - we're making progress, and the kids are exposed to new ideas on a regular basis that they can pull from in their endeavors each day.

What kinds of fun math things do you do in your household?  I'm sure I'll eventually want to mix it up a bit, so replacement ideas are very welcome!